Ah sweet unemployment. There seems to be a direct correlation between how little money and prospects I have and how fancy my already champagne tastes become. I should draw a bell chart noting this.
In an attempt to get my desires out of my system, here at a few of the things I desperately want but cannae afford.
1. Everything Le Creuset. In my heart of hearts I am a French chef a la the rat from Ratatouille. I long for these pots and pans the same way Gatsby longs for Daisy - he stares at the green light and I scroll through Instagram looking at charming French pots. In vain.
2. A flat in Bruntsfield or in the New Town. Two bedrooms. Authentic fireplace tiles. Wooden floors. My own bathroom. A bedroom bigger than a cupboard. My piggy bank is half full. I only need another two hundred grand for my dream apartment. I'm almost there!
3. Sophia Webster shoes. Can I walk in them? Maybe very slowly. Are they practical for the slippery cobblestones of fair but drizzly Edinburgh? Not exactly. Can I or indeed anyone afford to spend 500 quid on shoes? Ummm next question.
4. A trip to Iceland (not the shop which I can probably just about manage) to spend some time in Reykjavik which is the city of dreamers. And if there's anything I'm good at it is dreaming.
5. A private library full of books. Books I want to read and books I want to reread. I've been looking all over the second hand shops of Stockbridge and the New Town for a copy of Vera Brittain's A Testament of Youth. I refuse to pay full price as she is dead and willnae benefit from my coins. If only I had a magical library full of books I'd like to read and haven't even realised I want to read yet. I hear some people this a library and they are run by the council. Fie! Fie on you!
6. A coat that keeps me warm and looks stylish. I believe no such coat exists but that doesn't stop me ghosting the All Saints website.
7. Enough hangers. There are never enough hangers in my wardrobe!! Ever. I need an unlimited supply.
8. Spanish and Gaelic lessons. That make me fluent with ease; not confusing verb conjunctions. Why are language classes so damn spendy? All I want to be able to do is converse and read!
9. To be able to buy food from delis and independent shops and support wee entrepreneurs. But it's so much cheaper in the supermarket chains why are you tempting me Satan?
10. A book deal. If I got this I'd be happier than a pig in shit. Omg please publishers? Can ye no recognise raw talent?
What things do you lust after despite your wallet?
In an attempt to get my desires out of my system, here at a few of the things I desperately want but cannae afford.
1. Everything Le Creuset. In my heart of hearts I am a French chef a la the rat from Ratatouille. I long for these pots and pans the same way Gatsby longs for Daisy - he stares at the green light and I scroll through Instagram looking at charming French pots. In vain.
2. A flat in Bruntsfield or in the New Town. Two bedrooms. Authentic fireplace tiles. Wooden floors. My own bathroom. A bedroom bigger than a cupboard. My piggy bank is half full. I only need another two hundred grand for my dream apartment. I'm almost there!
3. Sophia Webster shoes. Can I walk in them? Maybe very slowly. Are they practical for the slippery cobblestones of fair but drizzly Edinburgh? Not exactly. Can I or indeed anyone afford to spend 500 quid on shoes? Ummm next question.
4. A trip to Iceland (not the shop which I can probably just about manage) to spend some time in Reykjavik which is the city of dreamers. And if there's anything I'm good at it is dreaming.
5. A private library full of books. Books I want to read and books I want to reread. I've been looking all over the second hand shops of Stockbridge and the New Town for a copy of Vera Brittain's A Testament of Youth. I refuse to pay full price as she is dead and willnae benefit from my coins. If only I had a magical library full of books I'd like to read and haven't even realised I want to read yet. I hear some people this a library and they are run by the council. Fie! Fie on you!
6. A coat that keeps me warm and looks stylish. I believe no such coat exists but that doesn't stop me ghosting the All Saints website.
7. Enough hangers. There are never enough hangers in my wardrobe!! Ever. I need an unlimited supply.
8. Spanish and Gaelic lessons. That make me fluent with ease; not confusing verb conjunctions. Why are language classes so damn spendy? All I want to be able to do is converse and read!
9. To be able to buy food from delis and independent shops and support wee entrepreneurs. But it's so much cheaper in the supermarket chains why are you tempting me Satan?
10. A book deal. If I got this I'd be happier than a pig in shit. Omg please publishers? Can ye no recognise raw talent?
What things do you lust after despite your wallet?